As a human, we have natural instincts that we were born with, and we have social etiquette which we have been taught and have learned. Nowadays, people tend to lead with natural instincts which can lead to some issues such as…. offending others, sabotaging success, or starting an argument. None of those we want. At times, it can be hard to keep our good manners as we feel we are being tested by others and their conduct. But as Kahil Gibran put it, “The real test of good manners is to be able to put up with bad manners.” People should always feel at ease in your presence and these manners listed below will help you achieve just that. I am not claiming to be the master of manners, and I too do not always follow these rules, but I believe it is important to always try our best.
- Be punctual
It is very important to be punctual because it shows a respect for another person’s time. If for some reason you are running late, call the hostess or whomever you are meeting. A text does not suffice. However, if they do not answer you can leave them a voicemail or send them a polite text.
- Rules to the RSVP
Anytime you are formally invited to any sort of function, you should always RSVP promptly. In simple terms RSVP means letting the host or hostess know if you will be attending or not. Never RSVP yes and then not show, only in the case of an emergency is this allowed. If you do not respond to the RSVP it does not automatically mean you are not coming, so be polite and respond with a no. If you have not RSVP’d that does not mean that you can just show up to an event, you need to make sure that you let your host or hostess know in advance so they can prepare.
- Stay off Cellphones
As technology becomes more integrated into society people are on their phones, tablets, and laptops increasingly. Whether you are at lunch with family, on a date, or at a party STAY OFF YOUR PHONE. Nothing is more important than the company in your presence. It comes across as rude, and the person may feel as if their time or conversation is not valuable to you. Be thoughtful of others.
- Basic Rules: Keep your elbows off the table, chew with your mouth closed, immediately put your napkin in your lap and don’t talk with a full mouth
These are all basic dinning etiquette which I am assuming most already know, but I will just give you a friendly reminder. Nobody wants to see or hear you chewing your food. Keep your elbows off the table that way you don’t bump or knock anything over.
- Keep personal conversation and arguments off social media
Private lives are called private for a reason. You should not want to share your private life on social media, and I can guarantee your Facebook friends and Instagram followers don’t want to be reading it. If you have an issue with someone confront them privately whether that be in person or over the phone. (Tip: some things can be misconstrued through text. Face – to – face or calling may be your best bet)
- Do not feel the need to capture every moment
This is a big issue with the younger generation, EVERY detail and moment of their life goes up on Snapchat. Live in the moment, even though pictures last forever, the memories will last you longer. Also, as I stated above not everything needs to be shared on social media.
- Do not show up to a party empty-handed
Always bring a small gift for the hostess, whether that is a candle, a bottle of wine or some food for the dinner party. It is always thoughtful to contribute because they spent time and money putting this event together for everyone.
- Always Hold the door for others within 100 feet
- Do not use vulgar language
Gentlemen and ladies do not use swear words. There are plenty of other words in the English language to express what you are feeling. It just comes across as classless.
- Never talk about finances
Never talk about how much something costs, how much money one makes, or ask how much something costs. It is rude to bring up money since it may make other uncomfortable.
- GENTLEMEN: Always open doors and pull out chair for ladies
It is always polite to pull out a lady’s chair at dinner, and it is always polite to open up and hold doors and car doors for them. And ladies always make sure to say thank you.
- Always write thank you notes
ALWAYS, write thank you notes to a hostess or for a gift. It is important to express your gratitude. Try to write the thank you notes promptly.
- Always offer to help your hostess
If someone has you over for a meal offer to help them prepare food, clean the dishes, set the table etc.
- Always wait until everyone has been served their food to eat
Everyone is hungry at the table, just because you were the lucky one to be served first does not mean you can just start digging in. Wait until everyone has had their food to begin, and if you are from a religious home wait until the food has been blessed.